This activity is designed to facilitate your thinking about
you and your spouse in terms of the orientation of each of you.  It will be helpful to think about orientation
as simply a reflection of individual style. 
On the dotted line between the ends of each scale below, put an X toward
the end that best characterizes you.  Put
a Y toward the end that best characterizes your spouse.  If you believe that either of you falls about
the middle, put the X or Y toward the middle. 
Once you have followed this process for each of the nine scales, think
about what the implications are for each of you and for your relationship with
each other.  What do you think the strong
points are that result from your individual orientations?  What do you think the problematic points are
that result?




It will also be helpful if your spouse completes this
activity.  This will give each of you and
opportunity to share your perceptions of yourselves and of each other.  Remember that your orientation is simply a
matter of style.  It is neither a
positive nor negative, good nor bad.  It
simply represents a dynamic or factor within your relationship that influences
how you perceive and relate to each other.




Once you have completed the activity to this point, go back
and put a Z on the line where you feel you would like to be with respect to
each scale.  The difference between where
you think you are and where you would like to be represents an important area
where you will be able to invest personal time and energy in enhancing your
personal style and your relationship with your spouse.




1. More dependent…..More independent




2. More people oriented…..More task oriented




3. More oriented to approaching people…..More oriented to
withdrawing from people




4. More oriented to affiliation and involvement with
others…..More oriented to personal achievement and success




5. More oriented to the quality of experience and
activities…..More oriented to the effectiveness of experiences and activities




6. More oriented to details and fine points…..More oriented
to generalities and the bigger picture




7. More optimistic…..More pessimistic




8. More oriented to security…..More oriented to opportunity




9. More oriented to consistency and predictability…..More
oriented to excitement and spontaneity